


The Wrong Baby

by Crowley_is_my_daddy



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-29 03:27:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19821598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crowley_is_my_daddy/pseuds/Crowley_is_my_daddy
Summary: Basically Crowley feels bad for what was gonna happen to the surplus baby so felt the need to raise itAlso this is my first fic so sorry if its bad, and j didn't proofread it bc I then would have just deleted it all, enjoy :)





	The Wrong Baby

Crowley was on his way out of the satanic nunnery after dropping off The Adversary, Destroyer of Kings, Angel of the Bottomless Pit, Great Beast That is Called Dragon, Prince of This World, Father of Lies, Spawn of Satan, and Lord of Darkness when he realised that he didn't know what was going to happen to the other baby and this made Crowley worry about how the babe would be 'disposed' of by the nuns and rushed back to the find him. He rushed back into the nunnery to find the spare baby and found a nun wondering around with a baby in a red blanket "is this the last baby?" he asked, trying to be inconspicuous due to all the American ambassador's guards fitted around the building, unfortunately the nun thought Crowley was referring to the anti-christ as 'the last baby' and not the left over one

"Yes, Master Crowley, this is the last baby" said the nun with a wink to further cement which child this was, and Crowley gave a wink in return to confirm this was the baby in need of removal. He put the baby in a basket and left

"Tara now" said Crowley with a wave as he left, feeling accomplished with his saving of a life, and he had to call Aziraphale straight away.

He was at a telephone box and wasn't quite sure how he'd put it into words that he was going to be raising a human child and was wondering if Az was interested in helping out. "Hey, Angel, it's me. We need to talk, it's about the anti-christ. Let's meet at the usual time and place tomorrow." He hung up before Aziraphale could reply and hurried home.

Aziraphale couldn't get a word in before Crowley hung up and wanted to know more sooner rather than later, but he decided it would be better to be patient and wait it out until the next day and so he curled up with a book and read through the night, Crowley fell into a deep slumber upon his return home and sleeping was something humans did that he enjoyed (like how Az liked cake).

The next day, Crowley got to St. Jamses park earlier than usual and he brought the baby with him in a basket and he was anxiously awaiting Aziraphales arrival, tapping his foot and constantly looking around until he caught a glimpse of his angel in the distance, whereupon he swept up his baby basket and hurried over to Azira. "Angel, you're late, where've you been? I've already been here for 25 minutes" he was clearly uneasy and his angel hated seeing him like this

"Calm down dear, we arranged to meet at 2 o'clock and it's not even quarter to yet, so I don't know what you're going on about my being late when I'm early, and what's wrong, you look positively on edge"Az raised his brows in concern, taking a hold of Crowleys arm and switching from one eye to the other and back again. "Let's sit down for now and we can discuss the anti-christ situation. And that basket of yours, did you bring a picnic?" Aziraphale's face started to brighten up when he thought that a picnic was the only thing it could be, he'd been dying to have a picnic with Crowley for as long as he could remember and could today finally be that day? Nope.

"Relax, angel, it's not quite a picnic, it's something more... alive, for lack of a better word" by this point, Aziraphale had already gone through a range of emotions in a short amount if time and confusion had just joined the party, Azira wasn't saying anything, just looking confused on the park bench, so Crowley decided it was best to just show him instead of trying to say it. "I've got a baby" he said eventually. Aziraphale looked at the baby, then at Crowley, then back at the baby, and finally at Crowley.

"You stole the anti-christ??" Were not the words Crowley was expecting to hear but bc he did and his smile went to a look of concern as he realised he probably should've said wasn't the lord of darkness and instead just a baby before hand but forgot to mention it.

"No, noooooo no no nononononono. No. This isn't the anti-christ, jesus angel, I'm not that stupid, he's the left over baby they were gonne throw away, or something, I had to save him or who knows what would've happened to it."  
Aziraphale's face started to brighten up again when he realised this wasn't the anti-christ and also that Crowley had shown compassion for the babe. "I'm probably not the best one to raise him and I didn't want to put him in a foster home, they're worse than hell I hear" Crowley started, "and well, I was just wondering if, you know" he continued, allowing the idea not yet complete float in the air for a while.

Aziraphale filled in the blanks on his own "oh, darling, I would love to help you raise the boy" a large beaming smile refused to leave his face and he couldn't stop looking at Crowley and the babe. Crowley was starting to get flustered at the sight of his darling angel and had to look away. He stood up and extended a hand out to Azira to shake hands as a means of setting their deal in motion of raising this extra child, but Aziraphale just held his hand and stay ed d there for a few moments. This just made Crowley turn more red and walk ahead of Az, although he didn't let go of his hand.

The two of them went back to the bookshop to discuss things further, i.e the logistics of how they're all going to be living together to make raising a child easier. They came to the agreement that the bookshop would be the better of the two existing residents as it's the larger of the two and more child friendly with the normal doors and brighter spaces.

"There is a slight problem with the three of us living in this house" started Aziraphale, "theres only one bedroom and wed need at least three: one for each of us-" before he could finish his point, Crowley interrupted

"Hang on, we don't need three bedrooms, why not just two? One for him and one for us, you don't sleep anyway do you? So what's the point in having three bedrooms when we could have two and the spare room could be my plant room" he th pi ought he was being subtle about the whole sharing a room with his angel whom he loved dearly for a loong time, but it was Aziraphale he was dealing with so him being unsubtle didn't really mean anything.

"I suppose it would make sense that, as parental figures we may share a room, and, as you said, it would mean less shuffling around of furniture so sure, let's share a room" a soft smile appeared on Azira's face which made Crowleys heart flutter. Then as if he was trying to spoil the moment, the baby began to cry and Aziraphale began to panic, hed never been responsible for a baby before, not in 6000 years of life on earth, he'd avoided every scenario vaguely related to babies and he was freaking out at the current situation. Crowley, on the other hand, brought out a bottle of formula and was just looking for the kitchen to heat it up under the hot tap. "H-how do you know what he wants?" Azira said, why would Crowley have any experience with children?

"I've already had him for a day and he kept interrupting my sleep so I learnt how he cries for the different things he wants, and right now he's hungry crying so we gotta feed him" Crowley continued to manoeuvre around the shop with his various different baby things, finally he swept up the baby and started to feed him. Aziraphale gazed at him as he gently swayed back and forth with the babe as it fed

"It's quite sweet seeing you two together, I wouldn't pin you as a baby lover dear" once again Aziraphale had a beaming smile on his face and Crowley almost couldn't cope, "we should probably name his, shouldn't we? Mephistopheles, Asmodeus"

"Weren't those the names you suggested when I said I'd changed my name? Back at the death of Jesus?" Aziraphale nodded and looked a tad smug at the reference, "anyway, those aren't good names for kids nowadays, people tend to go for things like Tom or Adam: rather boring names if you ask me." Crowley continued

"Well we can't have something too simple, but it should be traditional; biblical perhaps?" He knew Crowley would apose the idea but he thought he could give it a go to see how he'd respond. He laughed.

"There is no way I'm going to raise a child with a biblical name, it's bad enough that we're gonna be raising a child together, imagine what would happen if we got caught by our respective head offices? We'd be destroyed. What about Murdock? I think it's Gallic" suggested Crowley

"That sounds nice actually, what does it mean?" Az found this name rather interesting and could be a candidate for the childs name.

"Murder"

Aziraphale's face turned to a frown, his didn't want to raise a child called murder, but the longer he thought about it, the more he realised he actually really liked the name and his expression changed to one of contemplation and then back to a smile. "What're you smiling about, Angel?" Crowley didn't think Azira would react quite the way he did

"I can't deny that I really rather like that name dear" he took the baby from Crowley and gazed at his sleeping face "Murdock" he said softly, waltzing over to show Crowley "look at our little Murdock dear" Azira's face started glowing again, with a smile he couldn't get rid of, Crowley almost put his arm around his angel, but quickly got control over it and walked away.

"Well I suppose we should start renovating this place to make it suitable for us all to live here, which room should become the boys?" Crowley stopped walking and looked back at Azira with eyes that beckoned him to follow, they ended up choosing the attic for Murdock to use when he got older and needed his own room, but for now he could sleep in a cot in Aziraphale's room, he didn't need it but the building came with it and he never thought of changing it to anything else. Crowley sometimes used the bed when he was too tired to go home, or too drunk to sober up.

"Where did he sleep last night? Well you couldn't have left him in the basket so I'm just curious what you did with him"

"He slept with me in my bed, and somehow I didn't squash him" Crowley didn't really give it much thought but Aziraphale blush slightly at the thought of Crowley asleep with Murdock and his heart began to flutter. "But we ought to get a cot or something so he doesn't hurt himself by falling out if bed, shall we go get one?"

"Let's" replied Az with the baby still in arms.

As they left the bookshop to go shopping, they went into the Bentley and headed off to Harrods, but he was going 65mph instead of his regular 90, "I appreciate the lower speed while travelling through central London, but I've gotten use to travelling fast with you so why go so slowly?" Crowley didn't really want to answer because he knew it would make him sound soft, he was going slower because he thought it best to not go at vastly high speeds with a baby on board, and this wasn't any old baby, this was his child whom he wanted to protect. This didn't stop him from doing all of his trademark Crowley things though as he reached into the back seat (taking his eyes of the road for a good 10 seconds or so) to get something for Az. Aziraphale freaked out and grabbed ahold of the steering wheel while shouting at Crowley and his irresponsible he was being and when he came back to the wheel and handed Az a baby carrier.

"We've got a baby on board angel, can't be too careful" was all that Crowley said as he continued to drive as though nothing happened. "Anyway, were almost at Harrods so put him in that and we'll get to shopping".

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this :) hopefully it shouldn't be too long before I update again


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